Yesterday a comrade in writing had made a simple comment to me. She wrote, “You’re so smart.” It was innocent and sweet, but the comment sent me back in time to a place when I hadn’t felt too smart.
Being the youngest and only girl, my four siblings delighted in telling me, “You’re a girl, you can’t do that.” Despite my mother’s support, I bought into this misogynistic mindset hook, line and sinker. My older brothers were God-like to me, they simply could do no wrong. Breaking away from what could have been a lifelong emotional death sentence wasn’t difficult; it was an issue of survival.
Each of us is sent a variety of messages growing up. Some are positive and some are negative. Part of growing up and attaining a healthy, happy sense of self is learning to recognize the negative messages that others send us and tune them out. And sometimes we have to take extreme measures of breaking all ties before those ties break us.
Breaking ties with family or friends may seem brutal, but the alternative is emotional and mental suicide. It’s a choice, a choice to get away from carcinogenic relationships with people that are toxic to your mind or to remain surrounded by those unhealthy people and never living up to your potential or knowing mental freedom.
Perhaps you’re not daddy’s all-star football player or mommy’s little beauty queen or maybe you’ve scrapped a phat career in the automotive industry to become a starving writer. You do have a choice with your life. You and only you can choose to take the steps toward figuring out who you truly are, embracing your own beauty and moving on to live YOUR life.
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©2011 Yvonne P. Mazzulo, All rights reserved. No part of this article may be reproduced without prior permissions from the author or Clarity Digital Group LLC d/b/a joltleft.com.