Something a little lighter for a change. Like to mix it up a bit. Sometimes I get a little morose talking about the emotional challenges we face day-to-day and admittedly in these times that’s easy to do. Nevertheless, it’s important to be positive. Being positive helps you overcome challenges.
I’m not talking about “hope”. In my mind, hope is useless. It’s throwing away your control and giving control to everyone and everything else that’s in your life or in the world. You’re saying “I don’t want to make a decision, so anyone else, go ahead”. That never works out.
Being happy takes a decision. So go ahead and decide to be happy. That’s the first step. The next step is a commitment to be happy. We say, “I want to be happy and my decisions from on will be to that end” (along moral, ethical and legal lines, of course).
Here in Lake Elsinore I go out and see a lot of unhappy people. I don’t know for sure if they’re unhappy, but judging by the expressions on their faces, if they are they aren’t showing it. In fact, the only people I see looking happy are the salespeople into whose store I just walked. Your location is probably the same. It’s an eye-opener. Next time you’re out, look at people’s faces. You’d think the world’s about to end. Is Lake Elsinore really that bad? Hmmm.
How about a relationship with happiness? What’s stopping us? After all, we have relationships with other people, we have relationships with ourselves (OK, work in progress), and we even may have relationships with certain objects, like our houses and cars. If we want to be happy, we develop a relationship with happiness.
We start out working on the relationship like we do with any other relationship. This way, too, it becomes embedded in our life.
As we develop our relationship with happiness, it becomes a more prominent part of our life. We find that in just about every situation, we’re looking for our new friend. Once we see that new friend in a particular situation, we feel good having our friend with us. Don’t you like to do things with friends? Sure, it’s great to be your own best friend and all, but when you have a friend with whom to share the experience, it makes it a little richer. So it is with happiness.
Of course, there will be a lot of situations in which our friend is right there beside us, like when we’re watching a great movie, visiting “certain” (sorry for the quotes, but that is, after all, reality) relatives, or doing a favorite activity. We don’t, however, only have to have our friend happiness around in the easy situations in which it would be there anyway. We can now opt to call on it when we’re in other, more challenging or dire situations.
I like to use the workplace for an example. For a lot of us, the workplace is a necessary evil. We are not yet devoting our lives to our “destiny” and getting an adequate income, so we have to just make dueuntil that happens (I’ve chosen those words for a purpose).
So here we are at work, bored, not living up to our potential, not fulfilling our destiny, and we find that we are looking at the clock every 15 minutes or so, waiting for a break or lunch or the end of another day. Where’s our friend, happiness? Let’s call it up, shall we? Yes, happiness, why don’t you keep us company—we need you. Then, happiness shows up. Kind of makes the day go better.
The next question is probably, “well, what do I have to be happy about?” You see, we’ve got this programmed into our heads that we actually need a reason to be happy. What’s preventing us from just being happy? What’s wrong with that? You’re stuck on the reason—good. Be stuck on the reason.
We tend to defeat ourselves in this way. We have to have a reason to be positive or bring positivity in our lives. Who says? From where did that rule come? That’s the whole point—we don’t need a reason to be happy. I could say, well, you’re alive, look at all the positive things in your life that outweigh the negative. But do you see what we’re now doing? That’s right, we’re making our relationship with happiness conditional! We’re saying that in order to have a relationship with happiness, happiness has to do something to be earned. No! Just do it. Have a relationship with happiness because. Just because. Just because it feels good. And it’s not hurting anybody (including you), it’s not illegal or immoral or unhealthy. In fact, it’s probably very healthy. I don’t know the statistics, but I’m willing to bet happier people live longer and more rewarding lives.
Consider it. Me? I’m going to go off and be happy….