Living in Los Angeles can feel like living inside of the ego mind that has been set to full blast. We are surrounded by impossible standards of beauty, opulence, wealth, creativity, success, material possessions, and gorgeous landscapes. It can be so tempting to fall into jealousy as we look upon the appearances and lifestyles of others.
If we do find ourselves biting into the fruit of jealousy without a sense of higher awareness, the juice that we create from that fruit takes on the bitter taste of envy. If we allow the envy to go unchecked, it ferments into the poison of resentment. And when we carry an unresolved grievance against another person, it is the same as drinking that poison, and expecting the other person to die.
Those of us who have suffered jealousy know that it is always we who suffer– not the person we feel is the cause of our jealousy. Knowing this, why would we continue to compare ourselves to others when we know that pain is the guaranteed outcome?
Whenever we catch ourselves comparing ourselves to anyone outside of ourselves, we can know at that moment, that we have fallen into the belief of separation. This means that we have decided on the level of form, that we are separate from each other and from our Creator. We could never be better than or less than ourselves. If there is only one, then who is there to compare to?
However, on the level of form, which we experience in our human expression of life, we absolutely perceive ourselves as separate bodies. Therefore, we judge ourselves against the other bodies that we see around us. We do this to make sense of our world. However, the minute we go into judgment, we are choosing to validate the idea that we are separate and this always leads to inequality and pain.
The antidote to the negative experience of jealousy is to identify the positive intention of the emotion. Our emotions are simply our thoughts in motion. What we feel in our bodies is our reaction to our thoughts. So, if we feel jealous of someone, it helps to inquire into what that emotion is trying to tell us! What are the thoughts about that person to which we are reacting?
For instance, jealousy is just a message from our subconscious mind to our conscious mind that this person of whom we are jealous, simply appears to have what we want. They are showing up in our lives to help us see what it is we desire for ourselves. It’s never about the person or their personality, although the ego would drive us to hate this person if we didn’t stop to inquire into the thoughts that are driving the emotional reaction.
The next time we find ourselves jealous of someone, instead of reacting from the jealousy, we can make a new choice. We can stop as soon as we notice the discomfort we feel when we are comparing ourselves to them. We can remind ourselves that we are one, and that when we attack another with our thoughts, it our own mind that is being attacked. Therefore, we can allow the jealousy to be a messenger. Let it show us what we believe we are lacking, need, or desire. Once we accept the message, we can let the jealousy go because it is no longer necessary.
We can allow that person who we feel has the career success that we desire, to motivate us to strive to create our own experiences of success. Let their appearance of wealth and happiness simply be a model that we can use to remind ourselves that it is possible to have it. Rather than thinking that they have our happiness, decide that there is enough for everyone – and that includes us.