Oh how deep the sorrow does run
His little life had only begun
But now he has been carried up
By angels who will care for my son
His life in heaven will be so grand
More than I can offer on earthly land
Yearn my heart does for that babe
But with God’s grace I’ll heal again
Miscarriage, as defined by Merriam-Webster, is the “spontaneous expulsion of a human fetus before it is viable.” This definition is comprised of words that bear a description void of emotion toward an experience that for some encompasses loss, grief, and emptiness.
According to the American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, 15-20% of pregnancies result in miscarriage. The statistics reveal that the odds of miscarrying are fairly unlikely, which coincides with the reality that miscarriage is not as openly talked about as healthy pregnancies. As a result, a woman may be surprised or even overwhelmed by the physical and emotional pain that accompanies this tragic event.
Similar to the understanding that pregnancy is experienced differently by every woman, the same belief holds true for miscarriages. The types and intensity of feelings vary and may be manifested through various stages of grief. A number of women, consequently, find they are devastated by their pregnancy loss. Furthermore, the anxiety of the situation can often lead to feelings of isolation, fear, confusion, and despair. Living these powerful emotions may lead one to ask the question, why?
God gifted humanity with emotions because emotions are necessary in order to love. A family member expressed the meaning behind this beautiful gift when she stated, “We don’t hurt unless we love and we don’t fear unless we care.” Allowing yourself to feel the emotions that arise during tragedy enables you to learn more about yourself and the power of faith. With that being said, allowing yourself to grieve is a necessary step for healing. By working through this emotional battle, you are granted the grace of strength that is needed to move forward in life. Ultimately, you are armed with the capacity to endure future obstacles with the newly acquired gifts of wisdom, knowledge, and understanding.
Experiencing a loss is physically and mentally demanding, but it has the potential to strengthen the trust in and acceptance of God’s will. Although God’s plan for each person does not continually fall in line with human reason, His plan will always lead to a greater and more fulfilling outcome.
For information on coping with a loss through miscarriage, visit Share Pregnancy & Infant Loss Support, Inc.
For a list of miscarriage support groups that service residents of Wilmington, Delaware, visit Supporting Grieving Children and Families.