Miramar gun range closed in 2008. National debt rose dramatically since then. The fate of the nation hangs over default right now, and my closet contents hang in the balance at home.
In a fit of obsession akin to the Cold War bomb-shelter buyers, I cornered the market on incandescent light bulbs. My newfound supply will last my lifetime and well into the next. Yet, I am one among many hoarding the precious, soon-to-be-extinct commodity. Not alone, others are emptying store shelves just like me.
Politically incorrect possessions
But now I have to figure out where to hide them. Good chances exist that the Green Police will knock down my door, seeking to confiscate them right along with my 630 bhp automobile and CO2 meter. To ensure my 4th Amendment property rights, I’m couching a copy of the Constitution at my front door.
In light of self defense
If that doesn’t help, I’ll have my Winchester Defender at the ready. Getting my first one took exactly one minute. That was several years ago. Buying the second took three days for the Brady check despite that I am the same person now as I was then. I’m grateful the Green Police didn’t come for my bulbs during this time, as I would have been defenseless and devoid of the Constitutional right to pursue the happiness of bright lighting.
Another problem remains. The second Defender may be useless as a defender since there is no range within 60 miles to determine whether it works. Besides, I need to build competence so as not to shoot out the very bulbs I’m protecting. Yeah, the local range has been closed.
Ravage the range
The gun range was deemed unfit, despite being the perfect place and perfectly safe operation for testing the capabilities of legal firearms and the skills of their owners.
Why was the range closed? Let’s guess: Somebody got hurt? Somebody blew his own toe off? Somebody acted odd or threatening? No, no, and no. The range was closed for reasons out of range.
Outside the boundaries of the range itself, lead was found in the waters of a puddle. A California-style law suit ensued. The Green Police won, of course, though it took two years of court time and taxpayer monies. The range was closed, leaving locals’ firearms testing to their own devices. The backyard, perhaps?
Did I mention that the range that closed in 2008 was on a Marine base? It might have explained why lead is around now. It does not explain why people already choose not to drink or bathe in public puddle water.
I’ll admit, I am afraid of the Green Police. Alerted by the Audi Diesel ad (do not miss the green police video), I no longer ask for plastic bags in the stores, exhale in public, or drive my car to its capabilities. So, please don’t tell anybody about my light bulb supply.