Although we are inundated as children with the fairytale of love and marriage, commitment doesn’t always equal the happily ever after that we’ve been told and in reality, relationships can require a lot of work. Most people become eager by the prospects of being with someone forever and can rush into marriage and long term relationships without fully recognizing the things required. There are a few aspects of commitment that are not often acknowledged prior to the wedding day.
Marriage and commitment require perseverance. This means being completely open to dealing with the good and bad times in a relationship. In a good relationship, there will be happy moments often, but in a better relationship there will occasionally be conflict, frustration and sadness. Being equipped and able to deal with the range of emotions and situations that typically happens in a relationship is important in extending the likelihood of longevity of the relationship.
Compromise is also critical in a long-term relationship and ultimately means being selfless and allowing for room to negotiate so that everyone is equally happy and unhappy with the decision that is made. Being able to compromise, while not neglecting, some parts of self for the good of the unit will make marriage more manageable. Going into the relationship thinking only about self will lead to imbalance and ultimately discontentment of both people involved.
Finally, working to be completely vulnerable and exposed is vital. Going into a relationship guarded and defensive does not allow for the ability to fully express and accept the joys of being involved and in love. Although it might seem easier to go into a relationship with walls up to deflect the negatives, doing this can also deflect the positives. Being allowed to fully accept the totality of a relationship, including the pleasures and pains, encourages the strengthening and growth of the individual and the couple.
Despite the work required to maintain love and marriage, the payoff can be tremendous. Being fully aware and accepting of both the pros and cons can save the heartache that could come from being misinformed about what is really involved in love and marriage. Being committed to working through the bad as well as the good times is the true essence of commitment.